Conversation of the year

Taxi driver: May gusto sana akong itanong sa inyo.

Me: (Thinks of escape tactics once he brings out his gun/knife, or whatever weapon of choice) Ano po 'yon?

Taxi driver: May kinakain ka bang special?

Me: (Okay, he will sell me exotic food...) Paano hong special? Kakaiba?

Taxi driver: Oo—pangpaganda. May kinakain ka bang pangpaganda?

Me: Ay, wala ho.

Taxi driver: Nagtataka kasi ako, bakit ang ganda mo.

Me: (Putragis) Naku, (wishes to give a self-effacing response, but blurts out the first thing in my mind anyway in hopes to end the exchange) sinuwerte lang ho.
Taxi driver laughs, I come out of the cab alive.

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